As a young adult and college student, I have begun to notice many things from the past and the present with a new perspective. Recently it has come to my attention that it is hard for me to love the people who love me the most. Maybe this is not a revolutionary concept, but let's seriously consider it for a few minutes.
First and foremost, love was perfected (1 John 4) when Christ gave Himself as a sacrifice for me. He, above all others, loves me. He knows what it means to love me. He has loved me and continues to love me. Let's be honest though, it is hard for me to love Him. It does not come naturally, due to our fallen nature, to love and serve the Creator. Our flesh wages war against us so it is not easy to love Him. It takes energy, commitment, and diligence to devote love and service to Him. There's no room for complaint here, I'm simply making the observation that it is, at times, hard to love Christ, especially when we are faced with uncertainty and heartache.
Next in line to take the blunt of my inability to love perfectly are my family members. Quite frankly, I have never seriously doubted that I was loved by my family. However, I constantly am faced with failure to love them. My parents and sister never deserved the way I treated them in the past. Why is it hard to love them? I don't know that I have an answer.
Admittedly, sometimes I "make up" for my inadequate love for Christ and my family by easily loving, serving, and giving to close friends and even acquaintances. Maybe I do this so I can selfishly feel that more people love me; to fulfill a desire to feel more and more love from those around me. Should I not feel sufficiently loved by Christ? That should be my sole contender for love, and yet why do I so badly "need" to feel loved by those around me?
Noticeably, there is no tangible solution. Maybe our solution is to consider the other side of the perspective: why is it hard for the people who I love the most to love me? I think we'll find that the answer to that question is rooted in how we love Christ and how we see the world and those around us; because I love imperfectly.
It's a perspective change that must take place. I delight to know that the transformation of the renewal of my mind is opening my mind to change how I view the simple nature of loving and serving others. It is hard to love those who love us the most.
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