What's In a Year?

A year is simply another year and at the same time is a complex and eventful set of 365 days.

During the year 2010, I completed two more semesters of undergraduate study, grieved the loss of a dear friend, celebrated my last year as a teenager, worked full-time in Minnesota during the summer, held to a three-bullet point philosophy: shut up, be humble and grow up, became a boyfriend and grew in innumerable ways spiritually, socially and academically.

As another year is set to begin, the greatest joy is that one more day has been granted, not to regret the past, but to celebrate the present with the hope of the future.

Birthdays

Today is the birthday of a dear friend and perhaps the only faithful reader of my thoughts.

Birthdays provide the opportunity to celebrate the past, the coming of the new, and the hope of the future. In common custom, birthdays are celebrated on the day of birth by month and day of each subsequent year since birth. I was informed by my South Korean foreign-exchange student cousin that Korean custom increases every person's age each January 1, regardless of actual day of birth. It is still common to celebrate the day of birth, however.

There are several official birthdays that are celebrated. The birth of Christ (Christmas), the birth of the Japanese Emperor and George Washington's birthday (Presidents' Day) are among the renowned birthdays.

Each celebration of birth is a reminder of the beginning of life, the inevitable end of life, and the hope for eternal life. Birthdays are not a commercialized means for consumerism but is an opportunity for worship to the Creator for what has been, what is, and what will be to come.

Gopher Christmas

For four days in the state,

there is not much to hate.

Snow covers each home,

and destroys the Metrodome.

Strings and horns greet my ears,

as Doc Severinsen leads Christmas cheers.

The city is still with chill,

as the sun sets over the hill.

Each storm brings more,

while people snore.

Then the traffic snarls

as shoppers are now borrowers.

A company of friends feeds the soul

with laughs that never take a toll.

Several games quiz the mind

and a win is not a hard find.

Scrooge and Cratchit take the stage,

when the Guthrie's Carol begins to engage.

Pizza and humus after the show

make the day no low.

Christmas in the North is grand,

with the best great aunt in the land.

Minnesota Nice prevails in all

as the snow continues to fall.

Advent-ure

Each morning, there is a conscious, perhaps subconscious, decision to make the day another day, or to make it an adventure. The mundane rituals of the day are not to be the day, but rather a part of the day, a part of the adventure.

This is the first week of the ecclesiastical period of Advent, the time of anticipatory hope for the coming Messiah as the Church liturgically recognizes Christmastime. Society has a 'countdown' until Christmas, anticipating gifts, family time, and holiday worship. This period of time is an adventure, each day one day closer and with greater anticipation.

Every day needs to be a day living during Advent. Life would be more advent-urous and with anticipation for the coming of the Messiah. The mundane would become celebratory joy and the rituals would become praise with eager longing for the revealing of glory.

The advent(ure) of life continues to and through the revelation of eternity. The advent must be observed each morning consciously deciding to live with great adventure each day.

Canker Sores

: a painful shallow ulcer of the mouth that has a grayish-white base surrounded by a reddish inflamed area and is of uncertain cause but is not due to the virus causing herpes, circa 1596

Canker sores are unpleasant.

Baking soda, hydrogen peroxide, excessive brushing, and other remedies are tried and only partially tested true. Our human knowledge and understanding is limited, even when it comes to what appears to be the simplicity of an aggravating mouth sore.

The humility of accepting the unknown seems to be more esteemed than advocating the known. Canker sores exist, but it is with humility that we submit to something greater than ourselves to understand their cause, purpose and demise.

Canker sores are unpleasant, but they can teach us something valuable, nagging us to remember: we are limited and there is One greater desiring our humble submission.

The Persecuted

Today is the International Day of Prayer for the Persecuted Church.

The daily assaults on the Church will not destroy the Church, but strengthen the Church. The recent attack in Iraq that left more than fifty Christian worshippers dead, the daily attack on Christian ethics and practices throughout the world and the harmful words spoken daily against the Gospel demand our prayers.

The Voice of the Martyrs lists these nations as Restricted Nations (''government policy or practice prevents Christians from obtaining Bibles...anti-Christian laws lead to Christians being harassed, imprisoned, killed or deprived of possessions or liberties"):

Afghanistan, Algeria, Azerbaijan, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Belarus, Bhutan, Brunei, China, Comoros, Cuba, Egypt, Eritrea, Iran, Iraq, Jordan, Kuwait, Kyrgyzstan, Laos, Libya, Malaysia, Maldives, Mauritania, Morocco, Myanmar, North Korea, Oman, Pakistan, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Somalia, Sudan, Syria, Tajikistan, Tunisia, Turkmenistan, United Arab Emirates, Uzbekistan, Vietnam, and Yemen.

The VOM lists these nations as Hostile Areas ("governments consistently attempt to provide protection for the Christian population, but Christians are persecuted by family, friends, neighbors or political groups"):

Chiapas (Mexico), Colombia, Ethiopia, Gaza and the West Bank, India, Indonesia, Kazakhstan, Lebanon, Mindanao (Philippines), Nepal, Nigeria, Sri Lanka, and Turkey.

"For I consider that the sufferings of the present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us." Romans 8:18

I am excited about the challenges and means by which the Church can support and encourage the persecuted. Through business venues and missions opportunities, the Church truly can exemplify the name of Christ as we allow the brokenness of persecution to more fully display the love and grace of the Lord.

Thanksgiving Preview

gratitude: the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciate for and to return kindness

Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. - Colossians 3:16

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. - John F. Kennedy

I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder. - G.K. Chesterton

The Whirlwind of Life

Yesterday, I was listening to a lecture regarding Hamartiology, that is, the doctrine of sin. The fall of humanity is undoubtedly interesting and the effects of of the fall bombard us daily. The lecture and its suggestions were realized when the campus siren sounded, indicating a tornado warning.

I love storms. Severe weather, winter storms particularly, excite me beyond normal excitedness as I cross into border-line weather nerd. Nonetheless, I realized something even greater yesterday during the storm that interrupted my learning about hamartiology.

The whirlwind of life, so named because of the tornado that enticed this revelation, is a direct result of the fall. This whirlwind is instigated by time. Time consumes us. Actually, we consume time.

The whirlwind of life is unnecessary. There is nothing that clearly dictates we fill our schedules, consume our time, as if we were a tornado. Sometimes our schedules cause just as much destruction as tornadoes. We ruin relationships, dreams and jobs. It is hard to rebuild a mess made by our schedules because once our whirlwind of life begins, we do not slow down.

God calls us to be still and know that He is God; not to keep running and declare ourselves, our schedules, our lives as God.

The Saints

We are inspired by the wise, the loving, the serving, the selfless, and the faithful. We sit alongside them, listen to their lectures, read their words and sing their songs.

Many have come and gone, and are yet to come, who have shaped the faith and lived accordingly. Saints come in various shapes and sizes, tongues and tribes, natures and places. All proclaim a common name. We are blessed to know the saints. We are encouraged and spurred to remain faithful.

We can never choose to be a saint. We can only trust and obey. We can only serve and love.

The saints teach us and motivate us, even after they have left us. We are not changed by the saints though. We are changed by love, grace, and holiness, the nature of God, as our hearts are molded by the Potter. May we always serve the One whom the saints have served and leave a legacy of His name.

The Radio

Quite frequently, I listen to the radio as I am driving, either music or public radio.

When I have passengers, I have a dilemma though. I can enjoy the company of my passengers with small-chat or intellectual discussions, relative to who is actually in the vehicle. Or, I can have the radio on softly to take away unpleasant small-chat but permit discussion. Or, I can wipe out all discussion by turning the radio louder than one can interject with discussion.

Since I do not find conversations awkward and actually invite others to feel uneasy, my real problem is that when the radio is on softly and the song is universally familiar each person is enticed to hum along, not so much as to sing so not to interfere with others.

Said humming may continue for sometime. Everyone knows the song and is clearly eager to sing it, but out of respect for said dilemma #1, the music is not loud in light of the possibility of meaningful conversation. And thus, the humming continues.

At this point, do you turn up the music so as to encourage singing? Or do you leave the music where it is at for the time and permit the humming to continue in case meaningful conversation takes place?

Each of these possibilities is clearly engorged when those in the backseat already cannot hear those in the front.

Maybe you don't analyze such situations as much as I do, but thankfully I have analyzed the situation for you and have no clear distinctive resolution for said dilemma.

Perhaps humming is like praying in your heart rather than out loud; just as meaningful, only presentably startling when you begin to talk to someone while they are engaged in such activity.

Tolerant Love

Our society demands tolerance. My God demands love.
If I am to love, I love the truth and tolerate nothing less.
I love by sharing the truth in love.
He has not called me to tolerate; He has called me to love.

His love meant delivering Christ for all people.
His love meant not tolerating the world, that is, sin.
His love meant dying for those He did not tolerate, that is, sinners.
His love meant conquering death for those He did not tolerate, that is, those who pierced him.

His love means reigning eternally for those He did not tolerate; now He calls them heirs.
His love means offering grace and redemption of sins for those He did not tolerate; now He calls them children.
His love means forgiveness and salvation for those He did not tolerate; now He calls them beloved.

Our society demands tolerance. My God demands love.
He came and did not tolerate complacency and ignorance.
The Lord tolerates nothing less than His offering of grace and redemption, truth.
May the same be true of me and my love.

Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani

"You are my witnesses," declares the Lord, "and my servant whom I have chosen, that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he. Before me no god was formed, nor shall there be any after me. I, I am the Lord, and besides me there is no savior. I declared and saved and proclaimed, when there was no strange god among you; and you are my witnesses," declares the Lord, "and I am God." Isaiah 43:10-12

There are not many times in my life where I feel exasperation and desperation, and yet, those are my feelings when I continue to read the news reels about Sakineh Mohammadi Ashtiani.

Sakineh is an Iranian widowed woman who, four years ago, was convicted of adultery. For that conviction, she has been sentenced to death by stoning, as is customary in this Islamic theocracy. This is not the end of her plight. A month ago, a newspaper in the United Kingdom printed a picture of another Iranian woman, who lives in Sweden, not wearing a head-covering, which is mandated for all women of Iran. However, Iranian officials misidentified the woman in the picture and thought the picture to be that of Sakineh not wearing a head-covering. For this, Sakineh was lashed 99 times in addition to her continued death sentence.

I have heard many stories of the Holy Spirit moving in Islamic culture during the last several years. Revealing Himself to Muslims in visions and dreams, many Muslims have seen Christ without ever knowing some intricate details they envision. CBN produced a short article about the Holy Spirit's work.

Please pray with me for Sakineh, her family, and the people of Iran. Pray that the Holy Spirit would continue to reveal Himself and that God would make His name known in such a restricted Islamic society where belief in Christ means severe persecution and death. Specifically pray that God would reveal Himself to Sakineh during her imprisonment.

Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all. Likewise you also should be glad and rejoice with me. Philippians 2:18 ESV

Investments

There is no doubt that financial investments are important for one's livelihood. Investments provide fiscal security and advancement. These investments can last a lifetime if wisely implemented and sustained. At the end of a lifetime, these investments also end, although they may theoretically be invested for another's investments.

Greater than financial investments are those investments in others. Most prominently, the investment of a relationship with Christ has the most riches and satisfaction to last eternity. Investments in relatives, friends, and acquaintances alike are immensely important and reap more benefits than any financial investment.

I am eternally grateful for my relationship with Christ. There is no greater joy in my life. There is no greater security, something FDIC and Wall Street cannot provide. There is no greater reward, salvation. I am also equally grateful for my relationships with others. Friends and acquaintances from all aspects of my life, at home, at school, and even my summer work life have richly invested in me and I have been blessed.

The paychecks, the bonds, and CDs have provided me no eternal joy, only the joy sustained by the world. My joy today is that from the great investment of my relationship with Christ and the investments made and received through the many blessings He has given me along this path of life.

The investments in others and Christ are scary; perhaps more scary than financial investments because they have eternal consequences. Nonetheless, the investments must be made daily, by the minute, so that those investments are not for personal gain but for the worshipful investment for the Almighty. May the investments I make and receive never be about me, but only about His grace, love, and power so that He is glorified.

Tomorrow I leave behind a summer in Minnesota and a week at home as I return to Taylor University. I am so excited about the investments during the year ahead to worshipfully praise the One who deserves all glory.

The Alley

There is an alley near my home that is not particularly interesting or artistically intriguing. In fact, this alley is very small. Only a half a dozen homes border its path. Nonetheless, I recently have had a desire to drive down this alley rather than the typical route to my home.

The alley is the way less traveled. It doesn't fit the mold of assumption and habit. I think that I prefer the alleyway because of the change in pace and the slight excitement of traveling along a path less chosen.

I am typically stuck in my ways and instinctively take the same roads time and again. In doing so, I nearly forget that the other roads exist. I pass by much of what exists simply because I do the things that I do time and again along the same path.

What alleys do we pass by each day? Who do we neglect? What opportunities do we pass? Whatever your alley may be...

The alley is nearly threatened to be forgotten by traditionalism, habitualness, and comfortability. There is always more to be explored than that which has been the traditional way of traveling, living, learning, and loving.

The alley near my home has nice bird houses.

Summer

الصيف
夏天
sommer
summer
kesä
été
Sommer
estate
夏
여름
sommer
verão
лето
verano
sommar

That explains "summer." Well, at least thirteen weeks of it. As I embarked to write this, I thought philosophical reflections would surely be included. Alas, I include 15 languages to describe my summer working at an international language camp.

Minnesota Tales

Before I floated down three miles of the Mississippi River today, my father and I passed a man walking alongside the road. He was wearing blue scrubs, carrying a black book, and wearing a black hat. "Let's see if he needs help," my father suggests. I proceed to slow down and we ask him if he needs a ride. He proceeds to tell us where he is going and we offer to take him two miles to the next road where we are turning another direction.

"Did you run out of gas or something?"
"Oh, no, I prefer to walk in the natural environment rather than artificial roadways. Let me tell you what I mean. There is going to be a galactic war..."

Let's stop there a second. When a man wearing scrubs gets in your vehicle, you think maybe he is a doctor who needs a ride. You rarely jump to the conclusion that he knows about a galactic war that you've never heard about.

"...and I don't want you to be scared, that's why I have to tell you about it. The governments of the world have destroyed the environment with plastic and removing the plankton of society. Now they will attack and the environment will take over again. The galactic societies will seek to destroy us one by one."

I pull the car to the side of the road where we are turning and this seemingly harmless, but potentially ill man, beings to get out of the vehicle.

"Don't be scared when the government tries to draft you, just stand strong and don't fight."

What surprises me most about this adventure was that it lasted about three minutes and he didn't give us the chance to get one word in. He was definitely on a mission to tell us about this galactic war. I guess I'm glad that I know about this war, but it probably won't deter me from getting plastic next time I'm at the grocery.

-----

A few weeks back my aunt and her family invited a husband and wife acquaintance for dinner. A retired professor and international teacher of English, the couple had amazing stories of international education. They spent several years in China during the 1990s and it gave me great insight to the cost of textbooks, a much dreaded cost for all students.

According to this man, when there was a cultural political upheaval in China the government pushed all educated individuals out of cities and brought in peasants to fulfill their roles. Librarians were included in this push-out while peasants came to replace them.

The government told these peasant-librarian replacements, "Take care of the books and don't let them get hurt." To the peasants, that meant not to let them be read, touched, hardly to be looked at with a cross eye. In fact, this professor traveled to China to do research and he went to a library requesting a book.

"I need [title of the book]." Ironically, he can see the very book he needs right behind the librarian's desk.
"I'm sorry, we don't have that book."
"It's right behind you."
"I'm sorry, we don't have that book."
This continued for over an hour with a translator.

The professor finally got the book when the translator lied about the professor's entitlements, but this means something significant for the Chinese people in a communistic society. The availability of educational texts is limited if not impossible due to governmental restrictions. The cost of fair and accessible education in China must be immensely expensive.

I began to contemplate this story when I bought my textbooks online. The cost for textbooks is undoubtedly a ridiculous amount of money for one book. The monopolizing of the textbook industry with new editions, authors, and editors practically paralyzes the availability of educational accessible material for a large portion of American peoples unable to pay for tuition, let alone textbooks. Nonetheless, the cost is nothing compared to that of a restrictive governmental society. What a blessing that I can pay hundreds of dollars each semester for a half a dozen textbooks!

-----

Of the seventeen years of existence of Camp Baker, it is rumored that this is the year of the poorest fishing. Although we certainly have not gone hungry, fishing has been a struggle like I have never remembered before. I suppose there are many environmental and biological logical reasons for this fishing decline, but maybe the fish are helping us to curb our human problems.

With a play on the words of Bruce from Finding Nemo, "I am a nice [human], not a mindless eating machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself. Fish are friends, not food."

I hope that the fish don't hold out too long though because I'm not sure I want to buy as many groceries next summer.

The Era of Brokenness

I have heard the modern era of the Church described as the time of brokenness. This brokenness has manifested itself in our homes, our hearts, our churches, and our communities.

Divorce, illness, economic strife, alcoholism, pornography, and even modernism have fed this brokenness; much so in my own life. Sin. Our brokenness, my brokenness, is a result, a consequence, of the Fall of Man.

If this is the era of brokenness, what were the former days? I have heard the times of Christ named the 'Era of Fear' and the Middle Ages the 'Era of Guiltiness.'

No governmental program or religious institutionalization can end fear, wash away guilt, and make the broken whole. Thankfully, our hope is in the Lord. He does end fear; He does cleanse us of unrighteousness; He does make the broken whole again.

I believe the claim that we live in the era of brokenness. Our own families, congregations, neighborhoods, and minds are broken. Our purpose for life is to worship Him and make Him known, not our sins. With the Spirit dwelling within, we are Christ, as the Church, to our own broken lives and those we encounter everyday.

He wants to make us whole each day. Are we on our knees, broken, every day eager for His mending? Do we have the heart to mend the broken each day?

Perhaps the 'Era of Brokenness' is not all that bad. We are forced to be broken before Him. We need to let Him make us whole again.

For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world - our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God? - 1 John 5:4-5

The Election

Editor's Note: The following is a sermonic excerpt from Mike Nafziger, youth pastor.

I was recently at the zoo with a friend. After we saw the cutest baby giraffe in the entire world, we went to see the rhinoceroses. As we approached, we noticed the oppressive smell coming from their pen. We looked out and saw three rhinos laying down almost completely submerged in mud and filth, trying to avoid the heat. The person I was with said, “Oh, these guys are kind of cute!” I said, “Cute? No! This is so sad! It’s 95 degrees out here and these rhinos are laying here in the mud and in their own feces and are getting attacked by flies! This is disgusting! And the saddest part of all? They like it!” I thought to myself that if I could speak rhino and went and told them that they didn’t have to live in their own filth anymore; that they could get up out of the mud and the zookeeper would give them a nice cool hose down and let them live in the grassy area; if the rhinos were offered this opportunity, they wouldn’t take it. They were drawn to the filth. They desired the filth. The filth was comfortable to them, and in their filth they were never forced to think about the oppressive heat facing them outside. Brothers and Sisters, the same is true for us! On our own, we are drawn to our sinful nature. It is comfortable for us, it is all we know. This is what Paul is talking about when he says in Romans 7, “Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?” But then there is hope: “Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” We have no means on our own to rid ourselves of the filth that we love to wallow in. But thanks be to God that even before the foundation of the world he chose us through Christ to be holy and blameless before him in love. “By grace we have been saved.” Only after Christ opens our eyes and our hearts can we see our sinful flesh for what it is, a pit of rhino dung. It is on this basis that we should read the rest of Ephesians 1, and in this understanding the promises of God become even more praiseworthy and awe-inspiring.

Passing June Thought

"I think I'm having an allergic reaction to life." - Andrea Baker

Sinful Man

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21

Ever since the Fall, we know that sin has permeated our world, our lives, and plagued our inner being with turmoil. Gratefully, it's not about us though. It's about Him. He has and does overcome this sin for His glory.

Yesterday, I went to the church that I'm attending this summer. The minister was no longer there. He had been removed from the pastorate after viewing pornography at the church. The district superintendent of the denomination's conference spoke openly and honestly about the situation, but then said something along the lines of: "we aren't here to talk about the sins of the world, we are here to worship God."

That statement made me think. Am I so consumed with thinking about my sins or the sins of others that I hinder my worship of Him? I am a sinner. There's no doubt about that. I have been redeemed and no longer am a slave to sin though. Sometimes I am guilt-ridden and consumed with focusing on my fallacies more than I focus on my worship.

He is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think. That in itself should entice worship. It is even greater that this is all done according to the power at work within us. Although we have fallen, He has redeemed. He is working within us to change us to worship Him more fully for His glory.

It's logical to say that we must know sin in order to know holiness. Thankfully, His grace is enough that we can live in His holiness. And this continues forever and ever. Amen.

Things Learned from 70+ Year Olds

The Bible says that those with grey hair have wisdom. Here are the highlights of living with seventy year olds:

"Fox News and styrofoam are evil." - Said as my grandmother discusses my conservatism.

"Napkins, paper towers, and plastic bags are meant to be stolen." - A rebuttal by my grandma's third cousin leaving a restaurant as she stuffs her purse and jacket with said materials.

"Good fun is when you laugh until you cry. Great fun is when you laugh until you wet your pants." - The wisdom of my grandma's best friend after the two of them peed on the garage floor.

"I've always done it this way, and it's worked. Why would I change?"

"I don't want to get old. But then again, I do want Social Security and senior discounts."

Living with "old folks" can be tiresome with grunts and moans of body aches, steadfast stubbornness, and a lack of youthful relevancy. Nonetheless, it is such a joy to share a part of life learning by living day to day. Watching, listening, and picking up on insightful and wise ways intrigues me and challenges me to cherish the time I am spending with seventy-some year olds.

I've always said that I want to be a lifetime learner; perhaps going to school forever. But it'd be a lot cheaper just to learn from those around me. With a self-focus during most of our lives, we have to be diligent about learning from others. I don't mean just what they say or do, but who they are as a person. When we learn who someone is and why they are that way, then we have a better appreciation for the relationship with that person and we learn about who we are and what we aspire to be. It takes an extra effort and there is no room for excuses: we have to utilize learning from those around us. Whether it's our friends, parents, grandparents, colleagues, professors, on and on. We have to learn, we have to invest, and we have to return. It brings me joy to know that I can learn from those around me and hopefully, I pray, others can learn from me.

Let's embark on this lifelong learning journey together.

Knowledge and Belief

I contemplated titling this "Knowledge versus Belief," but I don't think that the two ideas are opposing, but rather complementary. In particular, I would like to examine this statement, which evangelical Christians know: God lives in me (Galatians 2:19-20, 1 Corinthians 6:19-20). What do we believe about this statement?

The divide between knowledge and belief is great, and yet the two correlate directly. Scripture repeatedly warns against those who know the law, know the message of Christ, know His redemptive nature, and yet do not believe. Knowledge of salvation is not belief of salvation.

According to Paul, our bodies are indwelled by Christ and the Holy Spirit. If you're reading this, you probably already know this. I'm challenging you to believe it. The God of the universe, the Creator, the Almighty, the Head of the Church, the Spirit of healing, the Spirit of a faith that moves mountains lives inside of you, me, His people.

When we make the leap from knowledge to belief about this particular idea, we begin to live our lives in a way that boldly proclaims Christ for we have received grace and apostleship to bring obedience of faith for the sake of His name to all nations (Romans 1). We also portray our lives literally being the hands and feet of Christ. We are not consumed on our needs, wants, and even desires. We live by faith.

Perhaps of greatest consequence of believing this statement is that we can love. Without the presence of evil within, Christ can dwell within (Psalm 5:4) and He may love through us so that when others see us, they see the fruits of the spirit, with the building block of love (Galatians 5:22-25). When we know Christ lives in us, we easily talk about it. When we believe Christ lives in us, people easily see it.

Christ lives in you. Believe and live that truth.

The Waiter: Tyler

My great-aunt and I had lunch at a lakeside restaurant early this afternoon. It was a beautiful scene with delectable food. Our waiter, Tyler, was a college student studying business and psychology, as we would learn throughout the course of the meal. What we struck me as odd was not the fact that he was a waiter, for indeed this job was likely contributing to his continuing education. It was odd however how slowly and hesitantly he answered my aunt’s inquiries about his life. There are a few plausible explanations.

Tyler may have been a paranoid man worried about privacy and the fear of an 80-year-old woman stalking him. Let’s face it, this clearly is not a viable explanation. He may have had a bad morning and did not want to answer any questions about himself, which is possible, but unlikely since he had a clear smile and disposition about the beautiful day. The most likely explanation is this: Tyler compartmentalizes his life. When he’s at work, he’s at work. When he’s not at work, he’s living. Life and work don’t mix. There also may be a hint of the American way of keeping to oneself without vulnerability to only halfheartedly invest in people, but that’s for another discussion.

Tyler is not the only one to live this way. All too often, when we are working, we are working for the monetary gain, experience, or the like. We fail to include our job as a part of our life; either that or to the other extreme, we make our job our life. Perhaps this is due to the mentality while on the job: I am just an employee doing my job. However, this is an illogical way to work. No matter what setting, work, play, or school, I must live as an integrated person: a Christian, Hoosier, college student, employee, brother, son, friend, and on and on. To separate any part of who I am from the other would be to lessen my creation and worth.

Tomorrow morning, I will start a new job for the summer. Many college students will work the summer months only to return to “life” in the evenings or in the fall. I hope that I can work this summer realizing that wherever I am, whatever I am doing, that is the life that God has called me to live and I must utilize all of who I am at every moment, not solely for monetary gain or experience. My life is that which has been graciously given to me by the Father and whatever seed I’ve received, I must sow in the present, for the thought of tomorrow is a transient and earthly gain, not one set on things above.

Calculus, By Grace Alone

This semester, God blessed me, and/or tested my faith, with a class devoted to studying Calculus (a branch in mathematics focused on limits, functions, derivatives, integrals, and infinite series). Quite frankly, studying mathematics has never been a problem for me. I took a college Calculus class in high school. I only am taking Calculus again because, honestly, my Christian liberal arts college of choice does not recognize Calculus when aced from a secular university. All semester I saw this denial of transfer credit situation most negatively. However, my thinking changed today when I received my first C+ on any written work I have ever done, in my lifetime thus far. Quite a shocker to me since "I know Calculus," but what I realized is much more valuable to me than a perfected grade point average.

Our professor, a friendly, simplistic, introverted man nearing sixty, assigned the task to determine the source of mathematics. Two questions were posed: 1) Does God create mathematics and humankind merely discovers it? and 2) Does humankind create mathematics? If so, what is God's role (if any)?

At first when posed with these questions, I thought I had my answer: God created all things so mankind discovered Calculus. Well, that's a simplistic answer. This principle holds true to mathematical realism, which argues that humans do not invent mathematics, but merely discover it without attributing the original invention thereof to any deity, power, or source, which leaves a lot of doors open. While I still hold true to the principle of mathematical realism with the understanding of God as the creator, I believe that there is more. Mathematics, like all fields, holds truth to the wisdom and logic of God, so our discovery is imperfect and not comprehensive of the totality of mathematics since we cannot fully grasp the knowledge of God. In other words, as we grow in His likeness, we discover more and more about His infinite logic, but our understanding is limited.

I love mathematics because there is always an objective answer, procedure, and testable theorem, but today I realized that this is only a glimpse of the nature of God's creation of mathematics. Our continual discovery of His nature is never perfected in this life, so to believe that mathematics is discovered by man's own doing is quite false, for it is only by grace that He extends His hand to share just a drop of His understanding. I believe this holds true for all of our learning: it is not our discovery, but His grace extended to us that as we grow in His likeness He imparts bits and bits of His creation, logic, reasoning, art, and more.

And so, my Christian liberal arts college of choice does not recognize Calculus when aced from a secular university when the course is required for my major. Now, I do not despise the registrar for this decision. Instead, I am grateful for I realize that the same course I took last year means so much more to me when I took it this year through His eyes. No matter how much "I know Calculus," He created Calculus and it is infinitely beautiful to see just a glimpse of His logic, reasoning, and power through the study of this branch of mathematics. As I pursue lifelong learning, my prayer is that I would recognize that it is only by His grace that He shares these wonders with me and I praise Him for entrusting me with just a small fraction of His knowledge.

The Fallacious Nature of Love

As a young adult and college student, I have begun to notice many things from the past and the present with a new perspective. Recently it has come to my attention that it is hard for me to love the people who love me the most. Maybe this is not a revolutionary concept, but let's seriously consider it for a few minutes.

First and foremost, love was perfected (1 John 4) when Christ gave Himself as a sacrifice for me. He, above all others, loves me. He knows what it means to love me. He has loved me and continues to love me. Let's be honest though, it is hard for me to love Him. It does not come naturally, due to our fallen nature, to love and serve the Creator. Our flesh wages war against us so it is not easy to love Him. It takes energy, commitment, and diligence to devote love and service to Him. There's no room for complaint here, I'm simply making the observation that it is, at times, hard to love Christ, especially when we are faced with uncertainty and heartache.

Next in line to take the blunt of my inability to love perfectly are my family members. Quite frankly, I have never seriously doubted that I was loved by my family. However, I constantly am faced with failure to love them. My parents and sister never deserved the way I treated them in the past. Why is it hard to love them? I don't know that I have an answer.

Admittedly, sometimes I "make up" for my inadequate love for Christ and my family by easily loving, serving, and giving to close friends and even acquaintances. Maybe I do this so I can selfishly feel that more people love me; to fulfill a desire to feel more and more love from those around me. Should I not feel sufficiently loved by Christ? That should be my sole contender for love, and yet why do I so badly "need" to feel loved by those around me?

Noticeably, there is no tangible solution. Maybe our solution is to consider the other side of the perspective: why is it hard for the people who I love the most to love me? I think we'll find that the answer to that question is rooted in how we love Christ and how we see the world and those around us; because I love imperfectly.

It's a perspective change that must take place. I delight to know that the transformation of the renewal of my mind is opening my mind to change how I view the simple nature of loving and serving others. It is hard to love those who love us the most.

Inadequacy

Yesterday I was blessed by six one-on-one fellowship times with three brothers and three sisters in Christ. Each one was innately unique, special, and encouraging. Although such a social day can be wearisome, I finished the day with a great smile on my face for I had heard six accounts of what God is doing, six accounts of lives being transformed, and six accounts of inadequacies.

By the conclusion of the evening, I came to understand the common theme of our stories, which are complexly interwoven on various points: we are inadequate, we have failed, but we have hope.

In the words of one, "...my self-focus limited by ability to love myself and consequently love others."
In the words of another, "...I was ashamed that I had not stood up for what I knew to be true..."
And yet the words of another, "...I am inadequate, but may my inadequacies be found in Christ."

Our stories are not all that different. Sometimes we forget that when we have our "self-focus" perspective. We tend to think we are the only one's struggling with this or that, or that no one understands, or that somehow our perspective is inherently unique. While there are aspects of each of those statements that are true, our stories still are not all that different. We each struggle with failure, we each have inadequacies, and we all know these truths, but do we believe them for ourselves?

On a practical level, nothing changes except our perspective. We still have regrets, we still have inadequacies, and we still fail. Perhaps we need to be reminded of the most complex aspect of our faith: Jesus Christ died for our inadequacies because He loves us. Even better, those inadequacies died when He died and we are now adequately alive in Him.

Hearing the stories of our friends, our families, and even strangers should entice us to examine how our stories are intertwined in the story of Christ. What an encouragement that we share that story so that we may fellowship, rejoice, mourn, grieve, laugh, and celebrate our lives together as brothers and sisters!

As one of my dear friends told me yesterday, "...my heart is heavy with the weight of inadequacy and failures...thankfully I am not alone."

One Cat, One Liver

Friday evenings tend to be either exhilarating or mundanely indicative of a weekend of homework. Nonetheless, tonight would classify as exhilarating.

One of my friends is a biology major. She is highly intuitive and deliberately thoughtful in her continual quest for knowledge. Tonight, she superseded the realm of normal by enticing myself and another cohort to accomplish a dangerous, smelly mission in order to obtain one thing: a liver.

Our options were as follows: recent roadkill that was preserved enough for dissection, a live animal from a pet store to be sacrificed for science (ethical questionability was noted), or human biopsy (most likely living). The most cost-efficient and practical method was to find roadkill, which is seemingly not a complicated issue in Midwest America.

So, tonight, we embarked via vehicle onto the freeways and byways of central Indiana in search of recent roadkill. Within five minutes of our travel, we saw several options. However, it was my keen sense of sight which ultimately led us to the perfect specimen: a deceased cat, later named Mocha, preserved outside a home along a state highway, wet from previous day's rain, but in great condition for dissection and extraction of a liver.

As is custom in America, the man, myself, allowed my two fellow female colleagues to have the pleasure and opportunity to retrieve Mocha from the ditch with trash bags and latex gloves. Quick retrieval and a steady foot to the pedal led us back to the science facilities available to us for the dissection of Mocha.

Upon the arrival of said biology major's lab partner, we (they) proceeded to remove the cat from the trash bags only to discover a plethora of maggots, roaches, lice, and various other infectious creatures. At this point, I was safely on the other side of the room with an abundant amount of paper towel in my nostrils as not to smell the rotting carcass.

A quick decision making process led us to move the laboratory surgery outside of the facilities with fresh evening air and a perfect sidewalk for infectious insects to run away. Within ten minutes, surgery was underway; scalpel to skin, scissors to ribs, and tweezers to greater omentum. The liver was found beneath the diaphragm (where it normally is) and all four lobes were successfully excised with a small presence of maggot inhabitation.

After cleaning up the surgery "room" and equipment, the liver biopsy was placed in a protective tupperware container and placed in freezing conditions for later analysis.

Friday evenings tend to surprise you in many ways. Mocha surprised me tonight. I'm sure we surprised her too. There is great joy in surprises. God continues to surprise me everyday by what He's teaching me and those around me. "Be still and know that I am God." Perhaps we just need to be still before Him, trust Him, and take time to see what He's doing. I think that doing so will surprise us. And that will bring us joy, which we will hold onto until our faith is sight.

Whether you dissect a cat (RIP Mocha) or study organic chemistry, Friday nights will surprise you. Be willing to cherish those surprises.

The Beauty of Grief

Last night, there was a full moon amidst ominous clouds and a slight breeze. It was just another night like so many before it. However, my perspective was different than most nights. Like in all things, one's perspective worldview determines the values, attitudes, and beliefs about the simplicity of life.

And so, after time reading the word, praying, and singing hymns, I simply sat outside. Alone. Very alone. My perspective enabled me to see that in the scheme of this life, I was alone and will be alone. Family, friends, strangers, and those gone before me, cannot be with me in a value that permits me to be not alone. In other words, no matter what, I will be alone because people will fail me and the walk of life ends alone.

At face value, this sounds like a downer, but it's not. To me, this is joy: that I recognize that I am alone so that I must be dependent on the One who loved me and provides grace and mercy to love me still for eternity being humble before His throne. I am very alone and by being alone I have a great sense of belonging.

The past week of my life has been grievous with much reflection, sharing, mourning, and laughter. I have realized that I am alone throughout this week - no one else can know what or how I feel, no one can offer assurance of hope, and no one can comfort me completely.

The beauty of grief is that because I recognize that I am alone, I have been dependent on God for comfort, assurance, and hope. Revealed through nature, through loved ones, and through His word, God provides avenues for the beauty of grief to be realized. Our dependence on Him alone brings strength, hope, and joy amidst sorrow, grief, and pain.

Before the throne, in a state of grief, there is joy in being humble enough to be completely dependent and have a perspective that encourages growth. When we are at our lowest, is that not when Christ is glorified the most and our weaknesses become our strength?

There is beauty in grief - there is joy, hope, assurance, and ultimately salvation in dependence on Christ. I pray that I may delight in my grief and that my joy may be found in my lonely dependence on Christ.

The Walk of Life

A walk can cure many ailments. A physical walk with a friend can be encouraging, helpful, insightful, and fun. A spiritual walk with the Lord can be, and is, and will be, a challenge, troubling, scary, intriguing, and joyous. Whichever, or both, walks that we choose to take each day, shape us a little bit more into the image of God.

Tonight, I had the pleasure of taking a walk with a dear friend. Not only did we walk together around the back roads and alleyways of Upland, but we had the graceful opportunity to have our friend, our High Priest, our elder brother, our Father, and our Creator, walking right along beside us the entire way. We struggled through fears, emotions, and heartache and rejoiced in thanksgiving, praise, and hope.

The walk of life is hard, it's scary, and it's fun. Sometimes we just have to walk a little bit longer before we understand the complete nature of the meaning of the path taken. That's our hope: that we may walk just a little bit longer before our walk comes to an end and we look back on the joys, trials, and triumphs of the walk.

A walk can cure many ailments. We just don't always know how, when, or why those ailments come. At the end of the walk, we'll know that it was all worth it and that our walk has brought glory and honor to the One who walked alongside us the entire way.

The Standards of Life

As persons of the 21st Century, we adhere to many standards. Our standards are based, primarily, on what is acceptable, normal, and enduring. We conform to these standards, ensuring that we meet these standards for normal participation in society, without knowing why those standards exist and how those standards came to be in existence. We simply accept them, embrace them, and strive to better meet those standards.

In a Christian community, the first standard for societal living is dogmatically accepted as the Biblical text and its applications for daily living as a Christian (2 Timothy 3:16). At the same time though, we desire to adhere to standards that the world has set for us, that society deems as normal, acceptable, and that which promotes longevity. What we eat, wear, say, listen to, look like, think of ourselves, think of others, study, create, dream, and the like are according to some standard that we embrace as "right." Why? We want to fit in. We want to be loved. We want to have hope. We want to be successful.

If we choose to say that we do not adhere to standards and we are simply independent, free-living beings, then we are blatantly lying to ourselves. Everyday we compare our lifestyle to others, to the world, even to Christ. Every time, we fall short. We cannot meet those standards; no matter how much we try or blind ourselves to the truth. We will never live up to standards (Romans 3:23).

I have standards for myself, most prominently in academia. No matter how much work I accomplish or what grade I get, I'm not satisfied until more work is done, a better grade is achieved, and the cycle continues. I have expectations for others that they would be observant, responsible with time, and hard-working. These standards fail for me even with my dearest friends. Others have standards for me that I may more wholly serve them, love them, and invest in them. I know that I fail them daily. God calls me to live a life of holiness, and yet my flesh fails me.

And so, where is there hope? We cannot live up to what is expected of us from others, from the world, from ourself, or from God. We will fail. We have failed. We are failing. That is the hope. We cannot measure up to standards, not even God's, so instead, we fall humbly before our Creator and admit that we are inherently not good enough. We bow down and rid our life of ourself. We say, "I have nothing to offer. I cannot even live up to my own standards, so I give myself to you, as a living sacrifice (Romans 12:1-2)"

Is that a solution for the failure of meeting standards? In this life, no. Eternally, yes (1 John 4:9-10).
During our earthly life, the failure of meeting standards will continue, but as a living sacrifice for the living God, we live each day not with the attitude that we have failed to meet the standards of ourself, others, or even the complete holiness of God; instead, we live with the joy that we are not living for our own gain, but for the gain of the ultimate sacrifice that we may glorify and honor the Lord until we await deliverance to meet the ultimate standard in eternity (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). We won't meet standards to perfection in this life, but in our imperfections, we know that we are loved, we are valued, we are cared for, and we have hope for deliverance in the One who has loved us from the beginning (Zephaniah 3:17).

As brothers and sisters of the living Lord, we must encourage one another, carry one another's burdens and spur one another on as we struggle with failing to meet the standards that we encounter everyday (Galatians 6:2). In our failure, we are at our knees crying out, "Only you Lord are worthy and only you will remain as my standard for all ages."

Our hope and joy does not come from meeting standards and expectations, for we shall fail. Instead, our hope and joy lies in our submission to Christ (Jeremiah 17:7, Psalm 71:5). In our submission, we are utilized (2 Corinthians 6:16) for His sake in order that we may more fully serve Him (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Spare Some Change

" 'scuse me sir. Can you spare some change? I just want to get a bite to eat."

I heard these words immediately after getting out of the car after parking next to a parking meter in a thriving metropolis.

The man, dressed in sweats, walks timidly closer.

"It doesn't cost to park on Saturdays."

"I'm sorry sir, the sign says it cost before 5pm."

"Oh, it does, okay," he replies as he retreats and walks away.

When presented with this situation, there are many options, each for different walks of life. The respectable person may just give the man some cash. The disrespectful person may walk away without any words or with words of profanity. The logical person has various thoughts of concern about the beggar's use of the money and maybe selfish concerns. The Christian, I believe, has yet another response.

It is with great regret and agony that I failed, along with the company of four other friends walking with the Lord, to respond to the beggar in the way that Christ has called me. I don't know what went through my head at the time, but I immediately retreated within myself. My heart was torn between complying with him and answering to my "logic."

Contemplating the situation the following morning, I know that I failed Christ, myself, and that man. What would I have said? "Let me tell you about what I rely on for food and thirst..." and then proceed to tell him about Christ. Would I have given him money after that? I should have. Or, should I just have demonstrated love by complying with his request and not even share the Good News in words, but rather through actions? In any case, Christ has called me to care for the poor. He's also called me to share His love.

"Why didn't you share my love with that man?" the Father asks me.

I have no good reply. If I would have at least told the man about my Lord, then I would know that he has heard the opportunity for more than quenching earthly hunger. Even if I hadn't given the beggar money, I would have shared an even better gift. Or, if I would have just given the man some money, or gotten food for him, then I would have been demonstrating His love, not just dictating my faith.

The harvest is ripe (John 4). He expects me to love others uncomfortably for His glory. I can't go back to what was, but I can pray for what is to come and know that the Spirit will give me the words to speak and the confidence to act in order that His temple may be utilized for His good.