Editor's Note: This is the fifth of a reflective series entitled "A Reckless Love."
I am rarely legitimately angry. I think I have been conditioned to be this way. Molded to believe that anger is inappropriate, unnecessary, and maybe even sinful.
It is hard to conjure memories of Josh when he was angry. With only eight months of a close, intimate friendship, there are only a few moments I remember him angry. Usually, his anger was due to some social injustice or maltreatment of someone he knew.
As I have grieved the death of my dear friend for two months to the day, there have been several moments that I have been quite angry. Angry at Josh for his senselessness that has resulted in immense pain for those he and I love. Angry with people for moments of insensitivity and disrespect. Angry at the Lord for permitting Josh's death in such a manner, in such a place. Angry for the pain of the men with whom I have shared many tears. Angry at myself for not and perhaps being unable to do anything, to help anyone, to worship amidst suffering.
Unfortunately, the list continues.
From what I know of the Lord, He too is angry; at the presence of sin, with faithlessness, on behalf of others, and on and on. He is angry because He loves us.
I would not be angry had I not deeply loved Josh Larkin.
For some time, I believed my anger to be unnecessary and maybe sinful. Has not the Lord promised victory? Have I not experienced His works? What shall I therefore be angry about in His presence? It is true that the Lord has promised and accomplished victory. It is also true that I am angry. I shall not dismiss one truth with another.
A very real danger exists that anger may lead to sinfulness, yet I pray that my anger continues to lead me to broken humility, that I may be molded and shaped by the righteous anger of the Lord leading to love.
I know now why Josh was angry amidst the presence of social injustices, hurtful gossip, intimidation, and persecution of others through words or deed. He was angry because he recklessly loved.
Anger is the forgotten emotion of the gospel. Jesus did not display hot-temperedness, judgment, or wrath, but this righteous anger that made him an even more useful tool of God's will. Will we be angry about what Christ was angry?
ReplyDeleteThank you, Nathan for such a candid reflection. We love you!
ReplyDeletePerhaps I may go one step further...can anger with the Lord co-exist with deep love for Him? I say,YES! Count Isaiah, Jeremiah, David and others among those who expressed anger, dejection and dismay at God for their circumstances. And God preserved their emotions and their words in Scripture for us to contemplate. What a wise and loving God!